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From Our Front Porch Looking In

I'm such a lucky girl. 
Have I mentioned that before? 

I'm super overwhelmed. I know that I've mentioned that lately.
Last night Abby had a very rare fussy/crying/tantrum/high maintenance night. 
And I had so, so, so, so much to do. 
We leave for a week starting tomorrow, you see.
And I hadn't started anything. 
No homework. No packing. NO NOTHING.

And so, while I was out driving around with her (putting her to sleep) I called my beloved Papi. 
I told him I was stressed, that's it. 

And then I came home and cried to my loving husband. 
And stayed up until morning hours working.
And then my husband stayed home this morning to help me for as long as he could, putting off his own work.
Even though his work load is 20x mine. 

And then, as I was nestling down with the babe in my lap and trying to work on some homework, 
my doorbell rings. 
When I open it I find Morgan and Papi standing there. 

They were accompanied by cinnamon rolls, banana bread, and dinner sent from mom. 
Not only that, but Morgan declared she was here to clean and pack. 
And they both had overly welcome arms for the baby. 

I wanted to cry. 
I still do, just thinking about it. 

Told you I was lucky. 

So, now I'm packed. 
Abby is packed. 
Dustin is packed. 
Our car is three feet lower to the ground (um, babies require a large amount of...everything!)

And I'm still so, so anxious about (and somewhat dreading) this week. 
But, I'm prepared. Thanks to my family that makes me this lucky girl I am. 
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My stay-at-home-mom life permits me to have a lot of time to think.

I think that if I had to give a reason why I was hesitant to get married (which I wasn't, ever, at all, so don't get any ideas... this is solely hypothetical) it would be that I was going to be giving up the single life.

I had it pretty good. Or at least I thought I did. I was living the life. I think others probably would have died had they been put in my shoes. But I thought I was living the life (albeit "Mormon style").


I was going to school at BYU-ID, though over time this had evolved into going strictly online. I was working full time for an amazing doctor, with an incredible staff. I was doing work that a lot of people do for their entire lives. I felt like I had reason to go to work, I felt fulfilled as my job enabled me to learn more every single day as well as gave me opportunites to feel like I was helping and making a difference to others. The office was a fun, lively place where I made friendships that I hope will last a lifetime. 


I held a variety of callings in my ward, mostly in leadership positions. I was the perfect definition of a wardie. Sad, but true. Mock me all you want.  Although, sometimes (a lot of times), I stretched the rules a little (it's in my personality, it can't be helped). I did everything I could to ensure that not only I, but everyone around me was having fun. I attended all of the activities. I held parties and invited ridiculously large amounts of people to eat...off of my counter. I fed hoards of boys in the ward. I hung out in the boys apartments, played the role of the college girl with an apartment full of guy friends. We threw ridiculous parities together, with red carpets and all. And they turned out to be some of my best friends through those years. 


I had amazing roommates. Some not so amazing. But, what would college be without a little drama. I lived with my best friend. We bought matching scooters, made late night runs for fountain drinks, played pranks, and snuck into the guys apartments late at night. Our dreams were to travel the world together, accomplishing ridiculous fantasies and 


I never slept. I laughed all the time. I thrived.

I thought I was the happiest I would ever be. And I never wanted it to end.

And then I met a boy. Right at the height of my single life, writing a missionary who was about to come home, and planning my single life years into the future. I met a boy.

And I was comfortable. I didn't feel the need to impress him (poor him). I laughed with him until my gut hurt. I could cry on his shoulder for hours without being judged, but simply held. I told him things I'd never told anyone. We talked for hours. We did nothing for hours. And even then, I didn't want the days to be over.



He met my family, and they loved him (because he laughed at me when my dad nailed me in the face in a Thanksgiving dodgeball game--my family is cruel, it's true). Then he met extended family. And they loved him. And I met his family. And went on a trip with them to their sacred place (a.k.a. Disneyland). And I fell in love with them.





And before I knew it, we were planning a wedding.






And finding apartments, and combining and moving all of our junk. 
And then I was here. And I then I was sure I was the happiest I was ever going to be. 


But today, here I am. With this man. My best friend and better half. In our little apartment. With an addition, that made us a family. 
My biggest accomplishment today was that I threw the diaper at the garbage can and actually made it. One time. It's a big deal. Abby and I were both bathed and dressed before noon. Huge deal. And, one pair of my  pre pregnancy pants fit. One pair. 

And you know what? I would say I'm the happiest I'll ever be. But, I know one day my wonderful life will prove me wrong yet again. 

I will say, I'm the happiest I've ever been, or imagined I could ever be. 
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It was a lazy birthday day. 
Perfect. 

We slept in and took our time getting ready for church. 

On top of all of the fun from yesterday, I was spoiled even more. 
My favorites. 
Plus a gift certificate for a hair cut and color. 
This was so, so desperately needed. 

The husband waited on me all day. 
He even pretended I needed help holding the hymn book to hold my hand. 
How singles wardly precious is that?

 And, as per Harrison tradition, he made me a homemade sign. 

Our friends stopped by later with rice krispies and a candle (which I got to blow out with the help of their 2 year old son). 

After I napped with Abby, we took a lazy Sunday walk. 

What is wrong with this day?
Nothing. It was amazing. 

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Dustin was supposed to be keeping Abby awake so I could feed her before bed. 
This is what  I just found as I finished blogging. 


It's these little moments that I live for. 

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I'm pretty well known to count down my birthday. I don't think that will ever stop. 
But, it did in fact subside since having this baby. What can I say? She's way more fun to celebrate everyday. 

I used to dread birthdays on Sunday. Doesn't everyone?
Despite my Sunday birthday, my wonderful husband has made it a point to find make my weekend special. 
He always goes out of his way to make me feel special. 

We hung out this morning. 
Watching Lost and taking our time (my time) to get ready. 

Then, per the husband's instructions, we got ready to go shopping. 

 She's way cuter than I, so I'll show you pictures of her all ready. 
 We hit the mall pretty hard. 

Deseret Book, because the husband knew the way to my heart: a new book. 

As well as some super comfortable shoes. 
I'm sure I'll be wearing these all summer. 
There went what little motivation I have to not dress in sweat pants. 

Then a movie and cuddling in the dead middle of the afternoon. 
One of my very favorite things. Like always. 
We went for a walk and ate in. 

What a spoiled girl I am. 
I got the perfect Saturday of lounging and being with my new little family. 

PS, I love that my husband and daughter humor my love for birthdays and holidays. 
What sweeties. 

(you can see my other birthday spoilings documented here, here, and here)
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I'm feeling kind of overwhelmed today. I was yesterday, too. And I don't think it will change tomorrow. 

We have a busy summer. And it's just starting. 
I'm going to give you a run down to pretend that you feel overwhelmed with me. It makes me feel better. Even if you don't. 
Next week we leave or two family reunions. For a week. With a six week old babe. 
Is it just me or is it like a million times harder to pack for a baby to even go overnight than to pack for me and the husband to go for three months?
After we get back, we bless the babe three days later. Not in our home town. So, I get to pack again. 
That same weekend is packed to the brim with Ackerman family fun with Chase's farewell, and the sealing of Mike and Sam's family. Like I said, super duper fun and exciting, but packed. 
Then, we return, only for the husband to take the biggest test of his college career two days later. And his research projects for work are due. Minimum requirement for the papers: 45 pages. Yikes. 
(Yes, I understand I have no reason to be overwhelmed compared to my superstar spouse)
Then it's finals for the both of us.
Graduation for the Mr. 
Moving. 
It looks like we'll be returning to the valley that I love, at least a short time, until a career opportunity presents itself. Or grad school for the husband the following year. 
The unknown is enough to throw me over the edge. 
And then Brandon and Tori get married. 

And my hair is awful right now. 
It hasn't been done in almost a year. Please don't tell, I'm already embarrassed.

At least the unknown will be taking place in the valley that I love. 
My husband will run himself to the ground making sure he is taking care of Lady A. and me.
He's the most perfect example of a provider. Him and his excel sheet budgets.
(they are the reason we have been able to live off of savings since March-when I quit work) 
We have a place to live in the beloved valley (thanks to the G. Bon, always watching out for us). 
Our families are overly generous. Always helping this insane momma. 
I have the best, easy tempered babe. 

Did I mention her baby breath will solve anything? 
I could cuddle up to her taking her in all day every day. 

 And she's ridiculously adorable. 

And we have snow cones. There's always snow cones. 

I'm actually incredibly excited for all of these things. 
It just seems like a lot right now. 
One day at a time.
 (accompanied by our now sleepless nights)

Oh, on a side note, with all of these exciting things going on, I need my hands free more than usual.
Does anyone use a baby carrier they are in love with? 
Moby Wrap? Yay or Nay?
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Yesterday was obviously Father's Day. 
We had a lot of fun hanging out as a new family, celebrating the fact that the best dad in the world lives under this roof. 
He was sweet to amuse Abby and I. 

Abby gave Daddy Legos. 
They're his favorite childhood toy. 
Although she gave him a girly set, they both can't wait till they can create together. 


She was really enthralled
He received a gift certificate to go golfing, Hershey's Nuggets (one of his favorite), and a NYC puzzle (another favorite). Oh, and a must needed gift card for some dress clothes. What can I say, one you grow up you don't get all fun things anymore. At least it wasn't a gift certificate for socks. 

 After church we spent the day lounging on the bed, watching the US Open. 
Happy Father's Day, right?
(Despite the assumptions you may have drawn due to jokes in earlier blog posts, I pay more attention than a lot of wives who have never golfed before. And yes, I have agreed to attempt to pick up the sport.)

All in all, I had the best day. I hope my husband did too. 
But, truthfully, I have the best day with him everyday. 
He's the best daddy to our little girl. I hope I can tell her how much he's love her since day one. 
He treats me like a queen; he respects me, waits on me, and makes me feel as beautiful as ever (even after I've been awake all night with a baby, laid in bed all morning, and haven't showered by 5:00pm).

Dustin is a peacemaker. He is calm. He can calm me down (quite the feat, for those who know me). He only gets upset when you open the bag of sunflower seeds all the way. He is patient and loving. He will never say anything bad about anyone. He is brilliant. He is determined to be an exceptional provider for our family. He is prepared, always. He is motivated. 

I often fail to show him, let alone tell him, how much I adore him. 
I would say I love him as much as I did the day he first held my hand. 
I would say I love him as much as I did when he asked me to be with him forever.
I would say I love him as much as I did I promised him to be happily by his side for eternity.  

But I won't. 

I love him so much more. 
When I told him we were having a baby. When we found out Miss Abby was a little lady.
 I loved him even more. 
But, when I saw him become a father. When I saw him carry my daughter to me. 
When I see him run to her every day. 

My love grows beyond words. every. single. day. 

My perfect boyfriend became the perfect fiance, to the perfect husband,
to an unimaginably perfect dad in only a couple of years. 

  Happy first father's day, Dustin! 

Love, 
Your Girls




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To my Papi,
I’ve tried this before. And failed. I’ve tried to tell you how much you mean to me. How much of a better person you’ve made me. And it never works. There are no words for it.
I’ll try again.
For as long as I can remember, everyone around me has adored you. To this day I can’t mention your name without hearing, “You’re Lance’s daughter? I love Lance.” (This often also includes, “Lance can’t be old enough to have a daughter your age.) That is usually followed by a heartwarming or hilarious story. Sometimes the story includes both. They always mention how special you make them feel. How loved. How important. No matter how you know them, associate with them, or your history with them, you make them feel like they are irreplaceable. You make an impact on every person you come in contact with.
I am no different.
I hope the impact you’ve had on me is noticeable. I hope people see you through me. I can think of no greater hero.  A lot of my good traits come from you. Every time I open my scriptures I think, “I’m one more step to becoming like my dad.” Every time I embarrass my husband when I try to make friends with a waitress, or find someone we both know, I think, “My dad would love that I just did that.”
And now, as I start my journey into parenthood, I appreciate you so much more. I can’t believe you put up with me! 


The only thing better than having you as a dad, is knowing Abby gets to call you her Grandpa. What a lucky girl. 


As am I.

I hope your have the best day. 

We love you. 



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Since it is fathers day, Alyssa has allowed me to spend the ENTIRE afternoon and evening watching the US Open.  What a great fathers day gift! Nothing better than a relaxing Sunday afternoon watching golf while your wife acts interested and asks questions like....... "they said he just got a birdie, but do the players get to choose what species?"  That's a joke, Alyssa actually knows quite a bit about golf and she has even agreed to start taking lessons from me!

As I'm sitting here watching the Open I've noticed that there have been a lot of commercials of pro golfers, thanking their dads for everything they have done for them.  Since my golf skills have not yet been recognized as quality enough to get me featured in a Titleist commercial, I've decided to use this outlet as a medium in which to share my appreciation for my father.


If you don't know my dad, you're really missing out.  He's quite the character.  I wouldn't even try to count the number of times he embarrassed me as a teenager or try to explain all his quirkiness.  But now as I begin my own journey into fatherhood, I realize how grateful I am that he is a man of character (both interpretations included).

Never did he miss a ball game of mine.  He was always a great example of someone who respected women (he's SO good to my mom).  He is always willing to go out of his way to help me out. (hundreds of trips all over eastern idaho to bail me out from car trouble or bring me something I forgot). Always gave us fathers blessings to begin the school year, teaching me the importance of priesthood in the home.   He turned me into a steelers fan as a kid and talked me into cheering for Karl Malone instead of Michael Jordan because Karl could rebound.  These and so many others have made me grateful for having a father like him.

Most of all, I thank him for always being a Dad. That word means so many things and I think we all know what it encompasses. He has never stopped being my Dad.
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Dustin and I don't do date nights much anymore. 
Well, we try to spend a couple nights a week together (sometimes doing things a simple as the three of us cuddling on the couch watching Lost). 
But, we don't really get out for formal dates anymore. 

We do try to get out though. 
And summertime is the amazing time to have a baby; we spend many a days with the stroller in tow for our adventures. 
And today presented the perfect opportunity. 

Yard sales on Saturday mornings are pretty typical and expected for both of us (growing up with the moms that we did). 
And today we hit the mother of all yard sales. 

Turns out the town we live in throws a town wide, giant yard sale. 

A glimpse of other's junk, our treasure

How jealous are our mothers right now?

And, like any Mormonville party, it would not be complete without a bounce house, snow cone shack, and some grilled corn on a stick for sale. 

We wandered up and down the packed parking lot in awe of all of the used...things. Everything imaginable. Someone was selling a bathtub. 
We broke away with no purchases, although the husband was rather disappointed to be leaving without a corn stick. I could tell. 

Abby slept beautifully the whole time, and even endured a quick mommy-daughter jaunt to the mall later to wrap up some quick father's day shopping. 

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The husband just informed me that Target is one of our top merchants this year. 

It is second only to our landlord. 

It trumps Verizon and even grocery bills.  

What do I have to say?

Whoopsies... 
and maybe: Curse you, Target. 

Sorry?

Not really. That place is like a sanctuary to me.

(I'm not heartless, or self absorbed...promise. 
I recognize I should be sorry...that has to count for something.)
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In a few hours my baby will be one month old. 

In a few hours - one month ago - I was meeting a little girl that would forever change my life. For the better. 


Right now, a month ago, I was me. With someone kicking my from the inside every now and then. 

And a few hours later a became a mom. 

With a precious daughter. 

She may or may not kick me every now and then...still.  

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Dustin's amazing sister Lacey went through the temple (since she's going on a mission to Dallas, Texas!!) on Tuesday. 
I'm still a new mom of a new newborn so I knew the session would be too long for both Abby and I. But, we were passing through Preston to get to the temple, so I got dumped there along with the baby. Dustin went on to the temple. 
I say I got dumped because I'm not kidding, once you have a baby people forget you. 
That's alright. She's far cuter and way more lovable than I'll ever be. At least she's my offspring. 


Great Grandma Bonnie was able to come up and love on Miss Abby



Josh and Syd came back up to hang with the little missy some more. 
She sure does love them; and boy, they love her! The spoiled girl. She deserves it. 



Dustin came home early to hang out with all of us for the afternoon. 
We made a run for some Frisbee for all of us (how lame are we for not having Frisbee already? You would think we weren't about to graduate from BYU-Idaho, where the main sport is ultimate Frisbee.) and headed to the park to play some Frisbee golf. 
And then a snow cone stop. An obvious choice, especially when you spend time at the Ackerman household. 



Watching a movie, tired, after a fun afternoon
Abby's so loved, she gets admired all the time. Even in the bath. 

It's so much fun watching my little siblings (who are all of a sudden not so little) be aunts and uncles. 
I think they think it's pretty fun too. 

And those who don't, really need to follow Sydney's blog. It's the best. 

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About Me

Hi! I'm Alyssa, the voice of this blog. I'm a passionate homebody, lover of Diet Coke, good books, and laughing until I cry.

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